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For most women, the big ‘O’ is the most elusive phenomena in life. They may read all that they can get their hands on about the tricks to get orgasm, but hitting the right spot remains tricky. Whether you make it a DIY experience or get your partner to give you a much-awaited climax, be assured that you will end up having a better sleep quality.
Dr Niveditha Manokaran, a venereologist who goes by dr_nive_untaboos on Instagram, has shown some light in this dark tunnel of orgasms.
According to Dr Manokaran, the term can be simply explained as a “moment of climax which is characterized by intense pleasure and sexual excitement in any sexual activity”.
That means, it can occur during masturbation and also when you engage sexually with a partner. But what’s important to note is that an orgasm “feels different for every individual”.
“Different stimulation causes different people to orgasm,” explains the expert.
While some may get an orgasm from clitoral stimulation, some may reach the penultimate moment via vaginal sex.
Some women and men even have multiple orgasms.
But don’t get too excited about that idea, because Dr Manokaran states clearly that “not everyone is capable of having multiple orgasms in a row”.
“The time it takes to reach orgasm after you have just had one varies between sex and even individual people. Most people have singular orgasm,” she explains.
Nothing quenches our thirst to know more about scoring an orgasm, isn’t it? We totally get it, girls! Read on.
If you wish to take Dr Manokaran’s advice seriously, focus on these steps to get an orgasm.
The more you explore and be open about what you like, the easier you will make your orgasm journey. “Clear communication will help you understand your partner’s body and how it reacts to different stimulation,” suggests Dr Manokaran.
Don’t underestimate the power of lubricants in spicing up your sex life. And no, it’s not just for days when your vagina may feel dry. Lubrication can be helpful since the genitals become hypersensitive when slimy, smooth and wet, the expert says.
This may seem like an extension of ‘clear communication’, but this one is for your partner. The road to orgasm becomes smoother you listen to them during the process. Get experimental, but also learn to stop if they seem uncomfortable.
Essentially, for both partners to be able to orgasm, it is very important to know what gives each other pleasure.
Dr Manokaran explains, “During an orgasm, the body releases a hormone called oxytocin, which helps in better sleep quality, regulating anxiety, reducing the risk of heart diseases and much more. Hence you’ll find yourself sleeping like a baby after you come.”
In fact, in 2019, the Frontiers in Public Health journal carried a study titled ‘Sex and Sleep: Perceptions of Sex as a Sleep Promoting Behavior in the General Adult Population’.
It states that the combined release of oxytocin, prolactin, and the inhibition of cortisol following orgasm may prompt a sleep facilitatory effect.
While popular culture and the world of pornography may have portrayed an orgasm as the be all and end all of ‘good sex’, Dr Manokaran has a word of caution.
“Though orgasm is the peak of sexual excitement, it is not the only ultimate goal of sex. If you or your partner are not able to reach the climax, it is okay. Sex has so many pleasurable levels,” she says.
And we say that you must focus on enjoying it all!
Pleasure is also a a relative term and differs for every individual. No guide or manual can teach you the moves that may work.
But as the expert wraps up, what can help is “open communication, paying attention, consent and respecting boundaries, not just in bed… but at all times.”
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